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Blog 154 Tuesday 19th March 2013

There is a time eventually that, anyone going through Psychological trauma can no longer put on a "brave face" stay positive and have happy thoughts.  I have joined and read forums and gasped at the tenacity of some of the sufferers, I have read lots of accounts of persons in a similar or a much worst situation as me, but It is extremely difficult to "Stay positive" all of the time.  I'm sure eventually it catches up with us and we say it because ..........  it makes us, and our loved ones around us feel better.

Unfortunately,  I have succumbed to some automatic negative thoughts, those dreaded thoughts of negatively predicting the future  and wandered into a very lonely place.  Yesterday, I went for a Psychological assessment with a view to have  Cognitive Behaviour Therapy (CBT)
CBT is a short term therapy created after research showed the important role a person’s thoughts play in determining their mood and behaviour. Two types of therapies are combined in CBT: Cognitive Therapy which looks at a person’s thinking patterns, and Behavioural Therapy which focuses on a person’s behavioural response to those thoughts.

During the assessment I discussed how the Cancer has effected me and my family's life, the disappointment's of the chemotherapy and the cancer spreading to my lungs. I also discussed the recent loss of my Father and first wife Janice to cancer  and the devastation those losses have caused our family, especially to my sons loosing their mother at such an early age. I was unsure how I felt after pouring out everything to a total stranger but was glad I did.

I have been prescribed Fluoxetine 20mg an anti depressant otherwise known as Prozac and await the results of the assessment. In the meantime a further CT scan appointment has arrived for next week.

 

2 comments:

John Naisbit said...

Hi John,

I'm sorry to hear about your illness and I'm sorry to hear that you've been finding things difficult recently.

My warmestc congratulations on maintaining such an informative and thorough blog however through what must be such a difficult and exhausting time. It's a fascinating read.

We're currently researching different peoples' stories of cancer diagnosis and treatment for an ITV1 documentary which goes out in the autumn. It's about the importance of early diagnosis, particularly in relation to bowel cancer. If you had any spare time I would love to have a chat about how you've coped with your illness and your own diagnosatic pathway.

If you wish to get in touch please email me at: mreed@brooklapping.com

Feel free to have a look at some of our previous programmes at www.brooklapping.com as well.

Thanks and best wishes,

Matthew Reed

Anonymous said...

John , please don't take this as in anyway being frivilous about your journey.... but I would like to share something that helped me in my dark hours ....the song " I hope you dance " which has been recorded by many , including Roean Keating ...seeped into my brain .... and I put on some of my fav disco tracks ... (blinds down all alone )... Donna Summers ...Motown stuff .. The hustle .... and just let it take over .... I let go of the Adult... the responsibilities , worries, commitments, what ifs... stress..... and went back to the carefree days and that joy ..... It's like a buzz to the spirit ..... and more ... " never forget how to play "
It worked then .... and still does .... lift the spirit when no words can ;-)